Menopause Comes Fast      

By: Guest Author

Published: July 19, 2026

Red Hot Mamas Voices

Real women. Real experiences. Real insights into menopause and midlife health.

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Written by Lauren Calig- Guest Contributor

Life comes at you fast, too fast. Seriously. I find myself trying to wrap my head around the fact that a month has gone by, a year has gone by, a decade has gone by. I clearly remember thinking that twenty-five was old! But then, you get busy and cannot wait for either the weather to get warm or cold, for the sun to rise earlier or later or for the days to be longer or shorter.

If you have kids, you’re so focused on them, you don’t even realize that you’re getting older too. If you don’t have kids, then it’s surely something else that warps your sense of time. You feel, as if, there will always be another day, another moment to do what it is you want to do. Rarely did my younger self think about getting older.

Your body, ever so slowly, begins to change, usually from the outside in. You go to the doctor; you’ve shrunk. You notice a gray hair, a new mole or an age spot! Then, for me at least, you notice your periods are irregular. Here is where, maybe, I am different. I couldn’t WAIT for Menopause. Yes, you read that correctly, I COULDN’T wait for Menopause. No more periods, cramping, eating Motrin like candy, feeling bloated-all of it! I truly believed that once my periods ended, it was smooth sailing for the remainder of my life.

I am sixty-one; I still cannot believe that. SIXTY-ONE, because I still feel like I am in my forties, except every night when I wake up MULTIPLE times drenched. Or, when I am REALLY irritable. Or, when ANY OTHER Menopause symptom hits me-where are my keys? Did I respond to text or just imagine it?

When my periods finally stopped, I asked my doctor how long my hot flashes would last; she said about seven years. ELEVEN years later, I am here to also tell you that she also told me SOME WOMEN have hot flashes and night sweats FOREVER (think Smalls in The Sand Lot). FOREVER.

Now, you may be thinking, why doesn’t she take hormones? Well, she would, but she can’t due to a family history loaded with breast cancer among other cancers. Now, you may also be thinking, so what does she do to help with the hot flashes/night sweats? She (just like commercials) puts her head in the freezer, lays on the cold tile floor or goes outside in the snow until it passes. At night, you know what I do: covers on, covers off, leg out, leg in, fan on, fan off, in bed out of bed. ALL OF IT. Oh and I do have a small cooling pad that works for about five minutes.

There were also times, lots of times, that I didn’t feel like myself. I’d feel anxious or just plain lousy. I had read enough to know that this was normal for Menopause, but to be honest, that helped NOT AT ALL.

No one told me about Menopause. By the time I was in it, Perimenopause was a small, dim light in the rearview mirror.

Then, something amazing began to happen, famous women began to talk about Menopause and their symptoms IN PUBLIC. Oprah had a special that I recorded and shared with my husband. I wanted him to see what WE, ALL WOMEN, were experiencing. AND, I didn’t even have the complete list of symptoms that Oprah or Halle Berry or Naomi Watts had.

I also realized something that I had not before Menopause began for me-how many women around me were also struggling through Menopause. And then, I began to look back at the past fifteen years, and I again realized something. I realized that I had seen women that I worked with sweating at meetings or opening windows in the middle of winter. Then, I chalked it up to-I have no idea. I don’t think that I even invested the time to think about why they were like this.

It’s like when you get something new and all of a sudden, you look around and notice lots of people have it too. That’s how Menopause was for me.

I have now had many, many years with my symptoms. I have found that self-talk is great to reassure yourself that you’re not alone, not the only one who feels this way. Therapy now and then, medication to help me sleep, talking with others (not only friends) going through Menopause-all of these things have been helpful.

But, what would be REALLY fantastic would be to sleep through the night and wake-up feeling like me again-a girl can hope :).

Author Bio:

Lauren Calig is a Belonging & Community Consultant, retired Director of Multicultural Curriculum, Global Programs & Co-Director of Diversity, Equity, Inclusion & Belonging at Laurel School (Shaker Heights, OH). She serves on the planning committee for the Northeast Ohio Youth Climate Summit (NEOYCS), volunteers for Seeds of Literacy and is a researcher for The Hope Effect. She is a mother and grandmother.

The views expressed herein this article, written by a guest contributor, do not necessarily represent those of the Red Hot Mamas organization. The content is for informational purposes and should not substitute the advice of your doctor.